Our Children & Our Youth

"In Sri Lanka today, it ‘is not uncommon to discover motorists, ‘Including even drivers of double-decker buses, recklessly getting off the road, running on pavements where pedestrians go and pinning them to death. But laws of the land are so ingeniously worded and much more skilfully interpreted to prevent anybody ever being prosecuted for any crime. This is the order of the day ‘in our land."
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by Prof. Dhammavihari Thera

(May 01, Colombo, Sri Lanka Guardian) In an age of unmarried mothers and fatherless homes, of test-tube babies and surrogate mothers, I often ask myself the question whether it makes any sense for me to choose to write on subjects like what I have indicated above.

I of course write as a Buddhist, with a sense to guide and direct with a humanely cultural alignment. The cultural milieu in which Buddhist thinking had its genesis, was admittedly multi-faceted. Indian educational set-ups of guru-kula like those of Taxila, whether pre-Buddhist or post-Buddhist, have left their indelible ‘impress on the totality of human culture ‘in India.

How few ‘in this part of the Buddhist world, monk or layman, ‘Including the Nayakas of all grades, know the real cultural worth of early Buddhist monastic ‘Institutions like acariya and upajjhaya and the comparative worth, at global level, of concepts like in loco parentis, the equal of which in the Buddhist Vinaya tradition is putta-cittam upatthapetva and pitu-cittam upatthapetva Are these, together with positive identities of mother and father, uncles and aunts, vibrantly alive anywhere ‘in our midst? Our society today is too full of empty bottles on the racks and broken test- tubes thrown away ‘in the garbage bins.

What really come to our mind when we speak today about children? The belief may still be entertained today, at least in limited circles, that children are dispatched here from elsewhere and as much called back when circumstances necessitate. The Buddhist position on this which ‘is hundred percent biologically supported clearly maintain the parental origin of children. The total involvement of both parents is clearly expressed in the Phrase mata-pettika-sambhava or mav-piyangen bihivana. The reality of this physical contribution of the parents, i.e. of the sperm and the ova, unless unethically distorted and perverted through concepts like cloning or non- embryonic cells, necessarily generates a feeling of loyalty and a sense of belonging to parents. Children are ‘invariably the product of the very living process of parents. It ‘is lamentably breaking down on both sides, of parents and children.

But the world today knows of dreadfully painful concepts like ‘unwanted children’, and the more horrendous crime of their elimination through abortion. In the Dharma-dvipa of Sri Lanka, teenage boys and girls of school-going age know more of these, and the need for these, perhaps much more ‘Intimately than elsewhere. To get down to basics of human behaviour, unwanted pregnancies are no more than blunders of irresponsible gamblers, whether with the metropolitan elite or the less elite in the country.

In Sri Lanka today, it ‘is not uncommon to discover motorists, ‘Including even drivers of double-decker buses, recklessly getting off the road, running on pavements where pedestrians go and pinning them to death. But laws of the land are so ingeniously worded and much more skilfully interpreted to prevent anybody ever being prosecuted for any crime. This is the order of the day ‘in our land.

As far as motorists are concerned, their recklessness often being traced back to drunkenness, beathalyzer tests are now being globally enforced all over the world to reduce such calamities to a minimum., No human rights, ‘i.e. a right to drink anything anywhere, ‘is never invoked by men who have a head above their shoulders. This means bringing into the lives of humans at least a reasonable amount of what we would choose to call discipline, i.e. control over their behaviour. In order to achieve harmony ‘in the human community, discipline both of body and mind is absolutely vital.

It is this spirit of disciplining the human ‘in terms of his thought, word and deed, in order to fit him harmoniously into life of the human community, both for the happiness of man in his present life in the world and for the success of a life beyond this, which underlies the Buddhist culture of sila and sikkha. These cover a very wide range of human life like moral goodness of each ‘Individual, man and woman, ‘inter-personal relations within the human community, peaceful co-existence of diverse human groups segmented on the basis of religious and ethnic differences.

The first of these to be seriously taken note of ‘is the Buddhist insistence for respect of all life forms in the universe, without any discrimination between human and animal: skhino va khemino hontu sabbe satta bhavantu sukhitatta at Sn. v. 145. We are glad to note that today some of the world religions are turning in this direction, in spite of religious sanctions which, they have enjoyed up to date, to use animals for their food. They go even further to ban completely the use of animal products like leather, furs etc.

The, world wide respect for people’s ownership to their legitimately acquired property, now coming under Human Rights, was initiated by the Indians, Jains and Buddhists, more than twenty- five centuries ago. It is to be seriously reckoned with that these attitudes emerged more out of magnanimous considerations from among our selves for the good of our own fellow humans than from divine injunctions from above.

This down-to-earth attitude of humans towards humans and their immediate environment clarifies the Buddhist insistence on starting all ethical regeneration from one’s own home. Their elevation of one’s mother and father, out of whom one is born and under whose care and concern one lives, to the position of the believed-in-position of a Father in Heaven as Brahma’ti mata- pitaro [at AN. 1.70] has to be looked upon as a perfectly sound basis for realistic human ethics. Parents are correctly viewed as those who beget us (imassa lokassa dassetaro).

These basic words are for us to know the correct relationship that should exist between parents and children. Another chapter on child care and growth of love called satara sangraha-vastu [cattari sangraha-vasthuni at AN.II.32] comprehensively deals with four areas of parent-child relationships. These four areas are 1. dana or provision by parents to children of basic needs of food and clothing, 2. peyya-vajja or endearing forms of address, 3. attha-cariya or counselling/life guidance and 4. samanattata or emotional mobility of parents in situations of grief or joy of their children. With convincing emphasis the Pali text says that these serve like the axel-pin of moving chariot which secures the wheel in position: Ete ca sangaha loke rathass’ aniva yayato [loc. cit.].

Thus we see the culture of a young child growing out of the affection and care shown to them lovingly and continuously by their parents. It is a responsive process of interaction. But in a ruinously over-modernised permissive society like Sri Lanka where teenage boys and girls have to see all the time their separated parents marrying again and again, there could never exist love and care which is vitally needed for the healthy growth of children. Juvenile delinquency, we see, day after day, comes in the wake of such shattered homes.

The success or failure of a religion is to be measured not in the intensity of external glamour the patronising groups impose on it, via prompous parades and posters and wildly noisy media, but by the impact a religion is silently making on the lives of the people who adhere to it. All religions in this country have to agree that a great deal of strip-tease is constantly taking place in Sri Lanka as far as religiousness in the lives of people, of men and women of all ages is concerned.

How efficiently are the homes in this country contributing to the cause of rearing children? Are the more up-graded educational institutions any better? The State and the welfare of the people therein are obviously polarised and are moving in opposite directions.
- Sri Lanka Guardian